Peeves

There are few things that bother me more than stranger touching... here's one of them, let me set the scene:

I'm in a completely empty public bathroom with three or more stalls (let's say 5), and I enter into the furthest edge stall so that no one will sit right next to me while I'm doing my business. Enter new person.

Why is it that this new person ALWAYS chooses the stall directly adjacent to me? There are FIVE other stalls! Why did you feel the need to get as close as possible to me to pee in this gigantic bathroom?! UGH!

Imagining the tenth dimension

Really well explained! Super intertesting!

Watch Imagining the ten dimensions in Educational  |  View More Free Videos Online at Veoh.com

If you're the first person to meet aliens

This was sent from a friend, SO funny!

Definition: Hangry

n. Hanger, v. Hangry: Coined by the sister to describe the point in time when you are so hungry, you become angry. Marked by unnecessary short temper and what appears to the sufferer as "a bunch of idiots who can't get their lives together enough that I can get a bite to eat! GARRRRRG!"

Definition: Cube Farm

n. Cube Farm: A semi-circle of bench style desktop with no dividing walls that houses 3 to 5 workers. Each semi-circle has a 2' partition wall behind the computers where workers can post lonely personal items.

Definition: Stranger Touching

n. Stranger Touching: When a complete stranger has no body awareness and continuously invades your personal space and touches you regardless of repeated exaggerated non-verbal attempts to tell them they should stop.  Common areas where stranger touching occurs: planes, movie theaters, take-out counters in Chinatown

How to sleep while sitting upright

Now to be clear, I don't condone sleeping at work, but sometimes the need arises and it is SO necessary. As a result, I am a self proclaimed specialist in sitting perfectly upright while sleeping. Here is how it's done:

1. position chair so your body points directly at your computer, then scootch your chair all the way in so that the desk supports the lower part of your upper body.
2. pull bangs down artistically in front of face. This has the added bonus of making you look good, when really you are using them to camouflage the closed eye closest to the hallway.
3. pull up something on your computer that looks like you're working, but doesn't need you to physically interact with it. In my case, this is always a scholarly article.
4. place right hand on mouse, left arm wedged between your body and the desk, and proceed to sleep.

This has worked so well at work that often times I have colleagues come up to me and start talking to me while I am sit-sleeping, to which I immediately turn my swivel chair and begin talking to them in a manner which seems to say, "why, I've just been sitting here awake this whole time, what can I help you with?"

Beware though! A brief tale of caution: Often sit-sleeps are great for a quick snooze/reboot, but don't let it get out of hand! Sit-sleeps are only thwarted by the hibernate function on your computer, which leaves you sitting very still in front of a computer that is off, which is quite the embarrassing situation to be caught in by your cube-mates. Believe me, I know from experience...

Blogging: Day 1

After several people telling me that my day-to-day stories needed to be posted somewhere, Stranger Touching was born. So this will be my best shot to capture all of the hilarious stories that seem to plague my life.

Go team. Let's do it.